Me and my world

Plane Crash : Heading towards statelessness

2011-09-24T22:52:00.000-07:00

After almost three hours of the plane crash I'm still flipping from one news channel to another to get the Real News. The media is giving all kind of details and don't know which one to believe. Some say all are Indian nationals but others say there are few European. I don't understand why they can't talk to the airlines and give the details of the deceased and their nationalities. The government channel Nepal Television is running PM's address at the UN General Assembly!!!!!!!!

According to the people out there in Kotdanda, Lamatar, the police were keen on looking at the incident rather than saving the person who was still alive. They said "the guy was still talking and could have been alive if he had reached hospital on time." According to them he said "I can be alive please save me and take me to the hospital". The villagers themselves brought the injured in stretcher but the police van didn't stop to help him rather they asked to wait for the ambulance to arrive. I don't know what is the most important task for the police? Is it to save the injured or to go for inspection of the incident? I think people from Lamatar did whatever they could to help which is really commendable.

Last week when the earthquake shook us with 6.8 Richter scale, we didn't hear anything from our government and now with the behaviour of the police. I have now come to realize the absence of state and our country is heading towards statelessness.

Those Green Bangles

2011-08-17T09:16:00.000-07:00

The day before I left Dar Es Salaam, me and Kodili, my friend from Uganda, finally bought them in the price that we offered after bargaining for so long with the shopkeeper in Mwenge. I loved them so much that I wore them the moment I bought until I left Tanzania and landed in Nepal. But the moment I landed in Nepal took them out and I haven’t worn them yet and I am happy that I can freely wear them them from today.You might be wondering what made me take them off and why suddenly from today I can wear them.

When I left Nepal it was still Ashad and women here had not gone crazy for green bangles. As most of you might not know that in Nepal we have two major working calendars, so the months are obviously going to be different. So from mid July, the month of Shrawan starts where woman wear green bangles, put on Henna tattoo and fast every Monday for the well being of their husbands and unmarried woman fast to get a good husband. I don’t know how good is defined as these fasting are also said for Lord Shiva, who is often associated with the one who smokes marijuana and addicted to opium.

Till date I have never seen a guy who would fast in the hope to get a better wife or for well being of his wife. So why husband is made so important in woman's life and wife doesn’t have any importance in his. Isn't it the way of making men important and women useless and aren’t these things make men feel they are important and are to be treated in a special way. Aren't these practices leading us more towards inequality or making women feel inferior to men?

I can wear them freely now as month of Bhadra is starting . And of course I don’t want people to speculate that I was wearing them to get a better husband. It is not that I think too much about what people would think but I don't want people to believe that few green bangles can change the person we will be marrying into a good human being.As I believe there is no relation between green bangles and the nature of the people and I don't think it can have any impact either positive or negative on people's persona. Please correct me if I am wrong.

If I retaliate I will be characterless If I voice out I will be a slut

2011-08-09T08:04:00.000-07:00

I wore my family's honour
and walked hurriedly
trying to be on time
got into the public transportation
where
the uncomfortable gaze follows
me everywhere
and also the lewd remarks
the strange hands
trying to touch me
the strange eyes
judging me
If I retaliate
I will be characterless
If I voice out
I will be a slut
I get down & again
known try to get
cozy & unknown gaze
the same process
continues each day
& I struggle
Amidst managing
home, children and work

Where I belong to

2011-07-30T13:19:00.000-07:00

I stop and stare
at the dark sky
to see if the
moon and stars are out

the twinkling light
lightens up the sky
the evening breeze
pushes a bit
and takes me
to where I belong
into the arms of
the loved ones
into the warm embrace
of the closed ones
to the earth
that identifies me
to the sky
that protects me
I still stop and stare
to see if these
stars still belong to me
to see if these
breeze still brings
the fragrance of my wind
I still stop and stare
at the sky
I still stop
to feel the breeze
in the hope to be pushed
back to where I belong to
In the hope to be pushed
back to where I belong to

Exploring

2011-07-21T20:38:00.001-07:00

I am here in Tanzania thousands of miles away from where I actually belong to. It's been a week that I have been away and not speaking Nepali. It never occurred to me that someday I would be craving to speak Nepali. It also let me wonder that the thousands of people who migrate everyday in search for better livelihood options know only one language.

Here people speak Swahili, have a loud voice and greet everyone they meet, I guess this is the part of their culture. People are very lively and friendly here in Tanzania. The perspectives and perceptions that we come with changes drastically when we get exposed to the real reality. But often times reality is blurred because we want to see them through our lens and try to see what we actually want to see.

I haven't travelled much here and can't tell you about the places to visit or to eat or drink. The Global Platform is where I am most of the time and I can't give you the details of it either except for the training hall, which sounds quite boring.

Now I am outside my room as it is only 5.00 am here and don’t want to disturb my roommates who work really hard during the entire day. It is pleasant here outside my room except for the crows and my best friends who love me very much as they come along wherever I go and the cream that I use to scare them doesn’t quite work for a long time.

As the morning light and the darkness of night is blending people are getting ready for another day and I'm getting ready for a day filled with exploration, exploring Tanzania and myself.

अनुत्तरित

2011-07-08T23:09:00.001-07:00

सुस्ताएका मेरा
सारा रहरहरु
सल्बलाईरहेछन् किन
अस्ताएका मेरा
सुर्यका किरणहरु
उदाईरहेछन् किन
ठक्कर खाएका मेरा
सारा भावनाहरु
आँसु बनी नझरेका किन
बल्झिएर कराउने मेरा
अनगिन्ति घाउहरु
चोट बनी नदुखेका किन
काँडाले बिझेका मेरा
हरेक पाइलाहरु
रगताम्य भएर नबगेका किन
समयको बेगले उडाएका मेरा
सारा चाहनाहरु
बौलाहा भएर नहिडेका किन
आँखाले मेरा
मलाई हेरेर
चिनेझै नगरेका किन
आत्माले मेरा
मलाई छोडेर
अन्तै बास
नखोजेका किन ?????
अन्तै बास
नखोजेका किन ?????

Free writing@ Salsa Class

2010-10-05T10:57:00.000-07:00

I'm here at the place where there is loud music and people are learning Salsa. It is fun to watch them and it left me wondering how I can be so quiet sitting at the side and writing. There is a big mirror where people can see themselves dancing, ah such a joy. I remember myself growing up dancing in front of the mirror. Oh I wish I could be child again and do all the moves once I learnt. Dancing was always my passion and will always be whether I dance anymore or not. The music is loud and lovely, I want to dance with the music but I'm afraid I might make a fool out of myself which is the saddest part of being grown up. I don't know why we always want ourselves to prove intelligent and talented when we actually are not. I still want to dance in the rain and with the wind but I'm scared what will people think? But we need to overcome this and dance; here I don't mean dance as in its literal meaning but dancing for me is living my life and dance with the music of life. Often times we complain about those which we don’t have and forget to listen to our inner voice. So I believe it is essential to dance with the music as life plays and do the moves accordingly.

I wonder these people dancing with the music played by the instructor are not they capable of making their own music and invent their own form of dance. Are we always being guided by some seen and unseen forces? Are we not creative enough? Are we not intelligent enough? Yes we are but the fact is many of us don't know about the fact that we can create our own music, our own rhythm and our own dance. It's just that we all are busy imitating what others do, we have forgotten our hidden talent or else we are just too lazy to invent our own. The unseen forces has made each of us unique and given each of us different talent. But in only some they give the passion to continue their uniqueness and reach the ultimate peace. Often in solitude I ask myself what is the ultimate peace that human being are looking for ? And are human even capable to attain that peace ? And above all what is peace, are we looking for peace in money, knowledge, love or something else? What is our priority, what is that we are exactly looking for is the question we need to ask ourselves time and again. Is the peace that we are looking for is in that innocent smile or that mischievous look or as someone said peace is in seeing the other person growing up. I still don't know and I don't want to search for the ultimate peace as until and unless I don't stop searching for answers to my never ending questions. I will never attain peace and I think its ok sometimes to fail and to make a fool of ourselves or to behave as a child and to cry like a child and to live life in our own terms. Are we strong enough to feel all the emotions life has to offer? I remember one of my friends saying that life is to feel all the emotions and the challenge for us is to be capable enough to experience all these emotions.

Now something caught my eyes in this place i.e people dancing here are wearing different kinds of shoes. Their shoes tells their stories i,e where they came from and where they will be going. As each of our shoes tells their story; we all have our own stories to tell, some have stories of joy where as some have sorrows but we definitely have our own stories to tell. Sometimes we confine ourselves so much that we are scared to share all that we have felt the emotions of love, anger, hatred, joy, and sorrows. Human beings are so selfish that they don’t care for their own feeling. Have we ever cheated ourselves in that way, suppressing our own feelings and pretending that you never felt that way? Have you ever diverted your feelings and tried to ignore them? I don't know about you but I am sure that I have done that several times and it doesn’t bother me to admit it. There is no bigger sin than ignoring what we feel. These days I have been thinking about all these for long but could not find the solution as it is said that solution comes attached with every problem. And I think most of the times we only focus on solution and do not discuss about the problem or we cannot find what the problem actually is? Many times we focus on one thing and some other thing rises up. So it is up to us to analyze how far can we go or how far can we reach. I don't know what is wrong with everyone of us; we are racing to find something which does not belong to us or those things that we don't need to be happy. Running after materials is like counting the stars in the sky which will never end and you tend to run after the same material again and again and never be satisfied. I feel very much depressed and sorry by looking at those who run after happiness given to them by materials or some meagre money. Will it bring them happiness; will it bring them closure to peace? I wonder whether it really does but I believe they take you one step forward to more pain and one step backward from peace. So, it is up to us to decide on which direction where we want to proceed and it is up to us whether to live life with happiness or be in a miserable condition.

आफू नै गिरेको जस्तो लाग्दछ ?

2010-04-21T08:17:00.001-07:00

खुल्ला किताबजस्तो
मेरो जिन्दगीको
हरेक अक्षर पढेर
त्यसको लिपि
तिमीले नबुझीदिंदा
तिमीलाई भ्रमित पारेको
भान मलाई किन हुन्छ ?

मेरो जिन्दगीको
हरेक अक्षरसंग
अवगत भएर पनि
तिमी अन्जान भईदिंदा
तिमीलाई आशामा बन्ध्याइदिएको
भान मलाई किन हुन्छ ?

मेरा आँखामा तिमीले
आफ्नो प्रश्नक उत्तर खोजिदिंदा
निरुतर मेरा आँखालाई
आफु दोषी भएको महसुस किन हुन्छ
तिम्रो सामु पुगेर आफुले आफैलाई नियाल्दा
आफ्नो आँखाबाट मलाई
आफू नै गिरेको जस्तो लाग्दछ ?
आफू नै गिरेको जस्तो लाग्दछ ?

जानीजानी कसरी दिऊ

2010-04-20T02:23:00.000-07:00

आँखाको गहिराईमा
डुब्न खोज्ने
कसरी भनूमा
हृदयको धोका बन्द छ
हृदयको धड्कनमा
बस्न खोज्ने
कसरी भनूमा ढुकढुकी मन्द छ

मन्द मुस्कान कसैको
म मलिन पार्न चाहन्न
स्वप्निल संसार कसैको
म भताभुङ्ग पार्न चाहन्न
दोधारमा छु
कसैलाई भ्रमित पार्न चाहन्न
दुबिधामा छु
कसैलाई आश्रित पार्न चाहन्न

आँखाको गहिराइमा छ
अरुकै बास
हृदयको स्पन्दनमा छ
अरुकै आश
कसरी खोलिदेउ
म हृदयका ढोका
जानीजानी कसरी दिऊ
तिमीलाई धोका

तिमीलाई के को संज्ञा दिऊ

2010-04-20T01:09:00.000-07:00

थामेर हात छोडिदिने
डोराएर बाटो मोडिदिने
तिमीलाई के को संज्ञा दिऊ
बचाएर मलाई मारिदिने

पुछेर आँसु रुवाइदिने
झिकेर काँडा बिझाइदिने
तिमीलाई क को संज्ञा दिऊ
जिउंदै मलाई जलाइदिने

फुकाएर बन्धन अलझाईदिने
दिएर प्रेरणा खुट्टा तानिदिने
तिमीलाई के को संज्ञा दिऊ
मागेर जीवन त्यागिदिने

हृदयले गुमाएछ स्पन्दन

2010-04-19T18:58:00.000-07:00

लुटीएछु मा यसरी
आँसु पनि भएनछन् बाँकी
बाँचेछु मा यसरी
शरीर पनि भएनछ साक्षी
अस्ताएछ जीवन यसरी
चन्द्रसूर्यले भुलेछन् उदाउन
सुकेछन् भावनाका सागर यसरी
नदीसमुन्द्रले बिर्सेछन् बग्न
ओइलाएछन् चाहना यसरी
फूलहरु डराएछन् फक्रन
बल्झिएछन् घाऊ यसरी
संजीवनीले छाडेछन् निको बनाउन
छारिएछन् सपना यसरी
आँखाले छाडेछन् देख्न्न
टुक्रिएछ मुटु यसरी
हृदयले गुमाएछ स्पन्दन
लुटीएछु मा यसरी
आँसु पनि भएनछन् बाँकी
बाँचेछु मा यसरी
शरीर पनि भएनछ साक्षी

Are there any unseen forces?

2010-04-18T22:47:00.001-07:00

Sixth sense, intuition, telepathy, soul mate, soul, lives after death, past lives are the terms that I have been reading lately. I am also somewhat a believer of these terms and have experienced issues related with these more than several times as if it were for once then I might have called it a co-incidence. But repeatedly I have been experiencing it and I figured out that some unseen forces are urging me to act in the way I'm acting. There have been circumstances when I wanted to move out or discard the message it was giving but there is always something back of mind telling me not to discard those messages and when I do I know the consequences i.e something bad will happen or something against my will happens.

Recently, I am facing some consequences which I neither can control nor can I go against it. I'm troubled, terrified and moreover confused as without any scientific reasoning is it wise enough to believe in it .I wonder whether the books that I have been reading are influencing me to that extent that I have started to believe whatever is written in those books or the things that I am feeling are in fact true that some unseen forces are speaking to me. And I don't know where to seek the answers to my questions or quest my thirst of knowing what is that forcing us to act in a certain way.

In Life after Death, Deepak Chopra writes "Time has made each of us unique" which is in fact very true. We have brought uniqueness into this life from our previous lives and we will carry the skills that we acquire in this life into the other. And what keeps life fascinating is the creativity that the soul acquires constantly.

I have had discussions with several people regarding unseen forces and have received many responses. Some do believe in it where as some laugh over it and some argue that these are the conclusions of unstable mind. Here I don't want to argue about the beliefs that people have had all their lives as they all are right at some point or the other.

In every romantic literature and in songs we know that special focus has been given to the eyes. I have pondered all my life why has eyes been given special attention in love songs and poetry. I had asked these questions to myself more than thousand times but could not ask about it to anyone with the fear to be bullied. But lately what I have learnt is it is never too late to ask and it is ok to ask if we do not know anything. This query was fulfilled when I got to read the book "Only Love Is Real" where Brian Weiss mentioned that through eyes we can know if the person was with us in the past lives or not. As it is said that eyes are the way to reach one's soul, the book somehow clarifies that through eyes we can recognize one's soul or soul mate. Thus eyes are the ones that travel with us from one life to other and eyes are in fact the mirror of our souls.

There are both believers and non believers in this world but what I have been facing is that I can neither believe in it nor deny it completely. I can neither fully believe nor fully discard the consequences. I do not have any philosophical, spiritual nor scientific background nor can I give any logic of my argument. You might have perceived notion that I might have been highly influenced by the book but I felt these things even before reading those books. With every logical reasoning there have been illogical consequences and all the time I have been trying to solve the puzzle but could not give it a logical end. Thus, I am seeking answers from you all whether these terms are only making us ponder on these issues or are they challenging us to change our beliefs. Let me know whether you are the one who believe in logic or are the ones who follow illogical reasoning as I am the one torn between the two.

What we choose today will ripple through out a thousand tomorrows and at the same time do not trust reflections, not if you want to see reality.

Rare; yet so common

2009-01-09T09:08:00.000-08:00

I read an amazing news in one of the daily newspapers that many sons were given birth with a desire to get a daughter. In a patriarchal society like ours where son receive the major attention and daughters are neglected; the news is rare in its kind. The importance of son has always been the major issue though there are thousands of I/Ngos working for women empowerment and organizations working on family planning. Despite the initiative of encouraging people to regard sons and daughters as equal; discrimination based on gender is still prevalent in our society but these news really pestered me to think is the status of woman as it is portrayed? And are sons and daughters treated equally?

I pondered a lot in this issue but could not draw conclusion on this news. The couple just wanted the daughter so they gave birth to number of sons. In this case as well though the importance is given to a daughter; there will have some effects on the health of the mother. Where are the so called gender activists working in our country to raise voice against this and where are the family planning workers to give advise on whether you give birth to many daughters or sons the health of the mother will have the same effect. The media is praising the couples but no one is looking at the other side of the coin. If a girl is being given preference then is that being treated as equal; what about the health of the mother; the girl child is preferred and will get attention from the family but what about the sons; whether they will be discriminated or not by their parents. Gender activists should not only confine themselves with the issue of women empowerment but should also work for other gender as they also deserve the right to be treated as equal.

Though the deed of this particular couple is rare but the affect is common; in many cases when son were given preference the daughters were looked down upon and in this case sons are neglected. I wonder why our society cannot just think about equality rather discriminating one sex or the other. Are we not capable of appreciating what we have rather than looking for or going after those we do not have/possess? Cannot we respect things as they are? Do we always need to appreciate those which we do not have and criticize those we have?

Medium for expression

2008-09-19T17:48:00.000-07:00

Nepal is a developing country and like in most of the developing countries women are lagging behind in every sector from socio-economic, political to education. Though there are many organizations working for women empowerment the situation of women has not improved as it is supposed to be. In Nepal, there still prevails the trend of celebrating when a son is born and mourning when a daughter is born. Though there are certain incremental changes seen in urban areas, rural areas are still far behind in treating women as equal to men.

In context of urban areas, women are progressing but the freedom is limited to the choice of dress and shoes, a woman cannot decide on major issues of her life like what career to choose, where to work, when to marry, when to give birth to her child and in what number. The modernization in Kathmandu has limited women to being just an object of entertainment .The ever flourishing billboards in Kathmandu valley popularly known as hoarding boards is an example of how women are being treated as sex objects. From an advertisement of lady’s cream to men’s wear and accessories a lady model is used wearing revealing clothes.

In order to free Kathmandu from this modernization and so called freedom of women, Lasanaa, an alternative art space, along with women down the pub, an art group from Denmark has come up with the innovative idea to aware people on treating women as human beings rather than objects. This is a project which discusses on gender and democracy issues through public art. This project aims to aware general public through the use of billboards which is not for the commercial purpose but to make people understand about the matters that are crucial to the society and to its development.

The main objective of this project is to showcase most creative expressions about gender and democracy and to put forward the thoughts and expressions of the general people in billboard. Hence they are seeking for creative, multidisciplinary (art/text) expressions on the topic of ‘gender and democracy’ for this billboard. (For further information log on to: www.differentvoices.com)

Precisely, women are not made from men’s feet to be trampled upon by him nor out of his head to top him but out of his side to be equal with him and to be treated as equal to him.

म

2008-07-24T07:03:00.000-07:00

नितान्त एक्लोपनाभित्रको म
सारा संसारबाट टाढा
आफ्नै अन्त्यहीन सोचाईभित्र
आफ्नै बेग्लै संसारभित्र
कल्पनामा तैरिंदै
भावनामा उर्लिंदै
भित्रभित्रै खोक्रिएको
भित्रभित्रै च्यातिएको
हजार टुक्रामा च्यातिएझै
हजार टुक्रामा बाँडिएझै
बेग्लै संसारमा हराएझै
यो संसारबाट बिलाएझै
बौलट्टीपनभित्रको म
चेतनशील पगलभित्रको म
असम्भवताको आशमा
जिउँदो लाशमा
झल्केको म
मर्दै बाँच्दै गरिरहेको म
टुक्रिएर जोडिएझै
ठाउँ-ठाउँमा चर्केको म
अन्त्यहीन जोडाईबाट
पटक-पटक तर्केको म
आफैभित्र हराइरहेको म
आफुभित्र आफुलाई नै खोजिरहेको म

श्रव्यविहीन शब्द

2008-07-22T06:49:00.000-07:00

आँखाभित्र बसेर
आँसु बनी बगे
मुटुभित्र पसेर
भावना बनी पोखिए
बगेका आँसुलाई आत्मसाथ गर्न सकिएन
पोखिएका भावनालाई शब्दमा ढाल्न सकिएन
आँसु-भावना प्रस्फुटित भईइरहे
तर अर्थ बन्न सकेनन्
शब्दका श्रव्यविहीनताभित्रका
गुञ्जाई भए यी
रितिएका मुटुभित्रका
भावना भए यी
भरिएका पानाभित्रका
खालीपना भए यी
अद्श्य छाँयाभित्रका
द्ष्टी भए यी
अर्थ हुँदाहुँदै पनि
अर्थहीन भए
यी मेरा श्रव्यविहीन शब्द
सरल हुँदहुँदै पनि जटिल भए
यी मेरा श्रव्यविहीन शब्द

something from my heart

2008-07-22T05:59:00.000-07:00

आँसु बनी झरे पनि
तिम्रा आँखाबाट छचल्किएर झरे त म नै
भावना बनी पोखिए पनि
छतछुल्ल भएर पोखिएँ त म नै
आँसु बनेर झरे पनि
म तिम्रो आँखामा अडिन चाहन्थे
भावना बनी पोखिए पनि
म तिम्रो मनमा रोकिन चाहन्थे
तर
छचल्किएर तिम्रो नजरबाट झरिसकेछु
छतछुल्ल भएर पानाभरि पोखिइसकेछु
नजरबाट झारेर आँखामा सजाउँछु नभन
पानाभरी पोखेर मुटुभरी समेट्छु नभन
म झरिसके आँखा ओबानो हुनेगरी नजरबाट झारिदेउ
म पोखिइसके आफ्नो भावना सिनितै हुनेगरी पानाभरी पोखिदेउ

Women at work

2008-07-17T21:24:00.000-07:00

Yoshinkhel is situated in the medieval city of Bhaktapur near the bank of Hanumante river in Nepal. It is located within the Bhaktapur Municipality 1 km from Araniko Highway. It is a poor, backward and disadvantaged municipality in eastern part of the capital, Kathmandu. The community is inhabited by 135 families listed under disadvantaged and has a total population of 1594 people including adults, and children.

Sabina Matangi, a local from Bhaktapur was acutely aware of the domestic daily routine of the women in Yoshinkhel. She was disheartened that the women were staying idle. About two years ago Sabina’s frustrations motivated her to gather these women to be involved in income generating activities. The women from Yoshinkel were enthusiastic and so Sabina started a group called Social Action for Community Development to help focus her goals.

To start the knitting program first of all seed money was required. So the participating women contributed about Rs.50 to pay to the volunteer who trained them to knit. Sabina generously added Rs.500 from her own pocket. There were many other women who were interested in joining in however their husbands or in- laws did not allow them to participate as they regarded knitting as a low grade job. But now a smile flashes across Sabina’s face when she mentions that many husband and in-laws are helping the women‘s work. In fact many women show off garments that have been completed by their husband! Not only housewives but college students are also interested in knitting as it has been their source of income and they no longer have to ask their parents for pocket money. The knitting program has not only helped women create a source of income but it has also helped them realize that they are not inferior to any man in their community.

The women have been knitting a variety of garments including caps, socks, mufflers and mufflers attached with cap. But the greatest battle that these women have to win is to market the product effectively. Currently they have two clients in Kathmandu, one in Thamel, a tourist spot in Kathmandu and other in Jhoche, a place in Kathmandu. Clients can either place an order based on volume or on piece by piece basis. Currently they are working on volume basis. The local vendors are currently paying nominal prices for the whole orders and this barely meets costs for the women. Sabina is searching for a potential market where she can actually sell the product in or outside Nepal.

Till date, the knitting training has been held in Sabina’s house and she eagerly dreams of the completion of the building of the education centre. Sabina has been saving the money generated (after paying the women) from the knitting program to build up the centre so that she could shift the knitting centre and the education centre in the same building.

Sadly for Sabina, she does not hold much hope for grants or assistance from any local organizations. She recently asked for help and was disappointingly told they did not trust that she would use the funds properly. Sabina is truly grateful for the attention given to her project by NABUUR and the volunteer Neighbours. If Neighbour of Yoshinkel from Nabuur were not there then her dream of empowering women and educating the children would be impossible.

To learn more about Sabina’s work and to help her. Please login to:www.nabuur.com

Accidents and Compensation Policy

2008-07-17T07:19:00.000-07:00

In Nepal, there were many cases where we find in simple accidents vehicle drivers deliberately kill the passers by or the other vehicle drivers. This is not because the driver is a killer or has fantasy to kill but it is because of the compensation policy. The compensation policy of Nepal was designed in such a way that driver are urged to kill the victims. If a person dies in a vehicle accident then the other party has to pay only NRs.17,000 and some legal charges but if the person live is saved in the accident then the other party has to bear his medical charges of the other person . So this policy compelled the one party of the accident to kill the other party. There were many cases when vehicles were turned and hit the victim leaving him/her to die. Due to protests from the last few months these days this policy is not effective. Here I am not going to mention about the hit and run cases in accidents and not even about the compensation policy of Nepal.

Poverty in Nepal is a well known fact. People in Nepal do not have a decent earning and are involved in laborious works. You must be wondering why I jumped from accidents and compensation policy to poverty. Today I was talking to one of my instructor; he shared a very distressing fact. I will come to this fact a bit later. I was talking about poverty previously; there is a saying “Rich gets richer and poor gets children.” This statement is too ironic and true in many cases. Poor people while giving birth to children only think about the hands that work not about the mouth that asks for the food. The number of children might also be due to lack of access to contraceptives or due to lack of awareness. But today I heard that people mainly of Terai belt; marginalized and ultra poor people, they tend to bear children to get compensation. You might be wondering when these days government is discouraging for bearing many children; I am talking about the compensation for child bearing. But this is not the case, in the highway areas, parents themselves leave their child and domestic animals to be hit by the high speed vehicles so that they can claim for the compensation for the death of their child.

These days women population is highly missing from the population data in India and China. The sex selective abortion is high in rate, though the government highly restricts such abortions. There are numerous Indian citizens who come to Nepal for abortion. I was glad of thought that Nepal has yet not been influenced by these two neighboring countries. But today when I found that in this context my country is far too ahead of the world’s progressing countries, I feel dejected and shameless of not being able to help. Human by nature is selfish and tends to do anything for one’s prosperity but it is the limit to be selfish. The poverty of our country has made people so desperate that to have a decent meal they are not even hesitant to kill their own child.